至诚若金石 情怀若水 正是亦师亦友
坦荡如山谷 其人如玉 堪叹斯人斯疾
于学问 于人生 有执著追求
对师友 对世界 含不尽情怀
悼 词
今天我们在这里悼念我们亲爱的朋友我们的同学。怎么能够想象，这个人现在已经跟我们天人永隔了。他的音容宛在。是的，我们一想起他来，就是他开怀大笑的模样。那笑容，那么自信而朝气蓬勃；那笑声，那么爽朗而富有感染力；他盈满笑意的眼睛有的是对着世间的善意。这样一个人，温和良善、真实无伪、敦厚质直。可是天妒英才，他的过早离去，不能不使人们对上苍的安排郁郁不解，又忍不住会发出“斯人而有斯疾”的长叹。
回忆小天让我们悲喜交集。我们幸运生命中曾经与这么美好的人相遇，而他的离去也因此留给我们许多伤悲。忘不了，小天对学术的孜孜以求。他放弃了奋斗十余载而搏得的国内名牌大学的教职，丢下了杭州西湖的悠闲与富足，甘愿飘洋过海，在密歇根湖畔芝加哥大学校园内再次成为清贫的书生。曾几何时，只为验证一个回归方程，夜深了，还能看到他在办公室里孤单的身影；曾几何时，仅为查找文章中一个引文的出处，清晨里，便能觅到他在图书馆资料室里忙碌的脚步；曾几何时，正午时分他因过度劳累趴在自习桌上小憩，而胳膊边冰冷的饭盒只剩一半食物；曾几何时，当我们试图给卧病在床的他多一些安慰，而他却总是在不知不觉中，把话题转移到统计模型的探讨或是学术问题的分析。
小天对家庭的全身心付出我们看在眼里并且深受感动。为了妻儿的安居他数度迁徙，锅碗瓢盆，桌柜床椅，零零碎碎全靠手提肩扛；为了卧病在床的妻子，他穿梭于学校和医院之间，常年如一日，未闻他一声叹息；为了儿子乐天的考试、转学、比赛，无论寒冬酷暑，风雨霜雪，他驾驶着那辆破旧的老爷车颠簸于城市之间。八年来，我们看着乐天从一个懵懂的少年一天天成长，他的父亲言谈里没有艰辛，只有欣慰与喜悦。当乐天选择放弃芝加哥大学丰厚的奖学金，而决意去学费高昂的斯坦福就读时，小天对儿子的决定只有支持，对儿子的志气只有赞许，对于即将到来的生活重压，他没有丝毫的退缩和忧郁。当癌细胞转移的噩耗传来，小天坚决拒绝了乐天本人和我们让乐天休学陪他归国返乡的建议。他的心中虽有万千难舍的亲情牵挂，但终究敌不过对儿子学业的期许。
小天对师友真诚相待。他是一个重情重义的真性情人。无数次地，他念叨着老师们对他的言传身教与点滴帮助。他对未能报师恩感到深深的遗憾。他是同学们心目中不折不扣的“老大哥”。多少次，在同学们的电话催促声中，他不得不放下手中的工作，去“救急”解决统计问题；多少次，一封电子邮件就令他带来了统计软件、书或笔记；多少次，同学们搭着他的车子去中国城买菜，还不忘调侃他的万年老爷车；多少次，他载着同学朋友去机场并一同忍受着沿途塞车的焦急；多少次他无视年岁的差距和同学们球场较量；多少次他又倚老卖老，让学弟学妹们在他家餐桌前，洗耳恭听老大哥阐释生活的真谛。
当一个人面临生死考验的时候，他才能显露出性格中最真实的一面。小天留给我们最可宝贵的，是他面对绝症的勇气。在返回中国的一次旅程中他被诊断出癌症并接受了几个月的治疗。然而他无法割舍下他的学业。拖着虚弱的身子，他回到了芝加哥大学的校园。在这个校园里他已经孜孜奋斗八个年头。生命中大好的年华、黄金的岁月、生离死别的苦痛、成长的欢欣都与这块土地缠绕在一起。他以斗士的姿态回来，他渴望继续奋斗，他渴望有始有终。然而，病魔没有放缓它的步伐。在那个生与死的时刻，小天做出了艰难的抉择——他希望能够体面地死去。他从来是坦坦荡荡地生活着，磊落光明，那么死也要堂堂正正，可以从容，可以微笑。从直面死亡的那一刻起，他释然了，他通透了生，也通透了死。他从来不乏勇气，可是那一刻起他是真正的大丈夫、真正的勇士。
小天走了，给留在这个世间的我们以无尽的思念。他告诉我们生的坦荡和死的高贵。他成功地让我们以他想要的方式记住了他。因为记着你的笑容，所以，小天，我们在泪水中想起你的时候，依然能够微笑，尽管，这微笑立即为更多的泪水所淹没。
安息吧，小天。你的笑容永远与我们同在！
Joseph was a student in my seminar about honor. He himself was an honorable man who instantly understood what the class was about. He was full of vitality and ideas, and had very high expectations for the discipline of sociology. His impact on the class was huge.
I remember this once, it must have been the year 2005, when I ran into Xiaotian in one of the lecture halls at the University of Chicago. Good old Xiaotian was always up for a good talk and some intellectual stimulation. I went over, sat next to him, and we started talking about my future. I had failed my exam at Chicago, my career was off track, and I just wasn’t sure about what to do. Xiaotian thereupon offered me the kind words of consolation and encouragement of a big brother. He even suggested that switch over to sociology, saying, “Think about it, China has so many social problems, and they have to be studied by so many sociologists.” These were words spoken by a man who cared deeply about the people around him and his country, which makes the loss of his life especially painful for us.
Yes, he was like a big brother in many ways. Apart from being a positive and encouraging man, Xiaotian also had a car in Chicago, and so some of my colleagues and I were often bothering him about shuttling people back and forth, moving, and other such matters. When I helped my friend Justin to move, Xiaotian was there. When I had to have my books moved, Xiaotian was there. He was always happy to do so and never asked for anything in return. Xiaotian was a true giver, and we will miss him sorely.
I spoke to him a couple of weeks before he passed away. Xiaotian was in good spirits, despite being sick or tired much of the time. He said that he was working on his papers, and I wondered if I would be doing the same thing if I had been in a similar situation. Xiaotian was a man who, even in the face of death, unwaveringly believed in what he was doing. May his life be an inspiration for all of us.
